Welcome to those who want it.
welcome to those who need it.
Welcome to those who can’t live without it.
Welcome to those who can take it or leave it.
Welcome to those who catch and release it.
Welcome to those who catch, cook and eat it.
Welcome to those who nurture and feed it.
Welcome to those who pulled out a chair to seat it.
Welcome to those with open arms to greet it.
Welcome to those who tried to defeat it.
Welcome to those who now truly believe it.
Welcome

Welcome to those who hesitated,
the recently recapitated,
the spiritually ill fated,
the culturally out dated,
the heavily armor plated,
the cynically jaded,
the randomly mated,
the financially rated
the heavily sedated,
the nationally syndicated.
Welcome to all those who waited.
Welcome.

Welcome to those who eat beets, post tweets, arrange seats, foil cheats, massage teets, wear cleats, press pleats, escape defeats and bake treats.
Welcome

Welcome to those who wrestle alligators,
the country folk who bake those taters.
Welcome to the online navigators,
the charitable perpetuators,
the unionized electro-platers,
the unemployed bistro waiters,
the vacuum hose evacuators,
the publishing syndicators,
the puzzled spectators,
the mildew eliminators,
the statistical deviators,
the reformed dictators,
the horny speed daters,
the incarcerated traitors,
the artistic instigators,
the rotational rotators
and the soda pop carbonators.
Welcome

Welcome to the invisible people.
Welcome to the invisible people that aren’t real
as well as the real people that are invisible.
Welcome to the real people that are not invisible but only think they are.
People of all levels of invisibility can relax here.
Even if we do see you, we’ll pretend we don’t so, “Welcome.”

Welcome to those of you who taste like chicken
(not that I would know.)
Welcome

Welcome to the people of the distant future,
the people of the distant future will find a way to detect and read the electromagnetic traces
Left behind by our activities here
So welcome to the people of the distant future
unless of course they’re sitting there in their posh self righteous future looking back at us laughing at how primitive and backward we are..
if that’s the case, the people of the distant future can suck it.

Welcome to those of you who feel the suffering of the world
those who battle the suffering of the world
those who dream of ending the suffering of the world
those who are burdened by the suffering of the world
Set down your burdens and join us tonight
take heart in the beauty of the world
and see that your battle to make the world a better place is a worthy cause.
welcome..

welcome to those of you who have faced a world showing hate
A world casting doubt
A world causing fear
a world telling you that you will fail
Their attacks have made you strong and made them weak
we honor your strength and talent
and welcome you here

Welcome to those of you here seeking shelter
shelter from the turmoils of life
shelter from artistic persecution
shelter from the upcoming apocalypse
shelter from golf ball sized hail
shelter from the cosmic rays beamed at us from the mothership
shelter from personal judgments about your sick fucked up lifestyle
shelter from the haters and their hate
shelter from the attack robots
Shelter from the organ harvesters
Yes, there is shelter here
welcome

Welcome to those of you who have faced battles on the inside
battles that challenged you in ways the outside world never could,
battles against our appetites,
battles against our desires,
battles against our fears,
battles against our self-doubt,
battles against hopelessness
Battles against loneliness,
battles against pain we carried for years,
battles against bats
Battle on bat battlers
battling bats in belfrys
bats under bridges
bats in your mind
beat the bats by becoming a bat, be the bat
breath bat air
brush your bat hair
feel the bat guano moving through your bat bowels
My friends, while the war rages on, this battle has been won,
so relax in smiling, reclining, repose,
you are welcome.

Welcome to those of you who have lost loved ones
but turned that loss into triumph with the understanding
that we must treasure every moment
that we must experience life on every level
That we must cherish everyone we meet
that we must value everything around us
To those who’ve made the choice to be a light in times of darkness
welcome